Every child is born with the remarkable capacity to learn. But before they learn to recognise letters, count to ten or write their name, they first learn something far more fundamental:
Is this world safe? Can I trust the people around me?
The answers to these questions are shaped by responsive caregiving, the warm, consistent and nurturing relationships that help children feel seen, heard and secure. While often viewed as simple acts of kindness, science tells us these everyday moments are among the most powerful influences on a child’s development.
A national conversation about children’s wellbeing
In May 2026, Inceba Trust and Heartshine hosted the National Dialogue on Supporting Children Through Early Adversity in Franschhoek, with the support of FNB Care. The two-day gathering brought together representatives from government, academia, civil society, the private sector, ECD organisations and implementation partners to explore one important question:
How can we better support children to thrive despite adversity?
The dialogue recognised that many South African children are growing up in environments marked by poverty, violence, neglect and chronic stress. While these realities are complex, participants agreed that emotionally safe, nurturing relationships offer one of the greatest opportunities to change children’s developmental trajectories.
As Heartshine CEO Tracy Winde reminded delegates:
“If we want to heal South Africa, we must heal the bodies of our children.”
Her words captured one of the dialogue’s central messages: children cannot thrive when their bodies and nervous systems remain trapped in survival mode.
Why feeling safe comes before learning
South Africa faces a significant learning challenge. According to the National Dialogue, 80% of Grade 4 learners cannot read for meaning. While literacy interventions remain essential, the dialogue challenged us to ask a deeper question:
What happens when children are simply not ready to learn?
Research presented during the dialogue showed that adversity, including violence, neglect, poverty and chronic stress, can disrupt children’s developing brains. When children remain in “survival mode”, their brains prioritise safety over learning, making it difficult to concentrate, regulate emotions and build healthy relationships.
As Dr Leandi Erasmus of North-West University explained:
“You can’t do maths while you’re being chased by a lion.”
Responsive caregiving helps children move from survival to security, creating the conditions in which learning becomes possible.
Relationships shape developing brains
The science of neuroplasticity shows that children’s brains are constantly shaped by their experiences. Positive, nurturing relationships strengthen the brain systems responsible for attention, emotional regulation, decision-making and self-control. Encouragingly, the same neuroplasticity that allows adversity to affect development also creates opportunities for healing through positive relationships and supportive environments.
This understanding aligns with the World Health Organization’s Nurturing Care Framework, which identifies responsive caregiving as one of the five essential components children need to survive and thrive. Together with good health, adequate nutrition, opportunities for early learning and safety and security, responsive caregiving helps children develop secure attachments, regulate emotions, build confidence and establish the foundations for lifelong learning.
As the United Nations Children’s Fund notes:
“Responsive caregiving lays the foundation for children’s health, learning and wellbeing throughout life.”
What does responsive caregiving look like?
Responsive caregiving doesn’t require expensive resources or specialised equipment.
It is a teacher who notices when a child is unusually quiet.
A caregiver who patiently answers another “why?”
A parent who shares a story before bedtime.
A comforting hug after tears.
These seemingly ordinary moments communicate something extraordinary:
“You are safe. You matter. You are loved.”
For children living with adversity, these moments can become powerful protective factors that help build resilience and hope.
Preparing children in body, mind and soul
At Inceba Trust, responsive caregiving is woven through everything we do. Whether it’s strengthening relationships through Book-sharing, nurturing children’s faith and values through Inceba Kids, or mentoring ECD practitioners, our goal is the same: to help create environments where children can flourish.
Preparing children for school means more than developing academic skills. It means preparing them in body, mind and soul for a future filled with hope, confidence and courage.
Because sometimes the greatest learning tool isn’t found in a textbook.
It’s found in a caring adult who chooses to respond.
CONTACT US
Inceba Trust
49 Mphakalasi Street, Paarl
Call: +27(0)21 876 9139
Email: info@incebatrust.co.za
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